I'm feeling terrible. Not so unhappy now but yet troubled.
I'm sorry to my frens who are concerned about me.
I also never experienced something like this before.
For the first time in my life, i dunno wat to do. I feel helpless.

Maybe because for the first time it matters to me alot.
Not that the others dun matter to me.
But somehow the feeling is different.

In the past, I have been the one taking.
That's y now i understand the difficulty of giving.

I feel troubled because i dun have an answer.
I feel helpless because i dunno wat can i do to have the answer that i wan.

Are these all excuses? Am i finding excuses?
I wish i have more ideas, more courage or even more ability.

I'm not complaining or blaming anything.
I'm just hoping that's all.
These things are not decided by me.

Name Stella aka Dororo Heicho
Bday 6 may 82
Likes To bite
Wishlist: To open my own shop
To do List:
1. To have a shrot sleep.
2. To bite something each day!
3. To have a shrot sleep again!
4. To keep on drinking
5. To bite again
6. To try not to fall down